Life is Beautiful

I just finished watching 'Perks of being a Wallflower' for the third or fourth time, and I've realised what makes me love this movie so much. It's the way it shows how beautiful life is, even in those dark times when we feel lost or sad, or depressed, there's beauty in the feeling.

The greatest music is inspired by those times. People find themselves in the times when they feel like they've lost everything else. Our lives are shaped by those times that we feel most insecure and overwhelmed.

Life is beautiful, every second of it. And I believe that once we realise that, and start seeing the beauty in every moment, feeling and experience we have, our lives would be infinitely better. We're alive, and that's beautiful...

Weaknesses and Meanesses

‘So throughout our life, our worst weaknesses and meannesses are usually committed for the sake of the people we most despise.’

I’m currently reading Great Expectations by Charles Dickens, and I read this sentence, and i thought: this is so true. So I just had to write down my thoughts on it...

We’re usually the worst version of ourselves when we’re around people we dislike. We tend to get overly dramatic and we hurt the people we do like, just to ‘show them’ that they can’t get to us. And yet, that’s exactly what we let them do: get to us. We try to act all tough and uncaring, but in the end, the people for who's benefit we do that don't even notice.

It’s also true that  we try extra hard to impress the people we don’t like. Isn’t that strange? Aren’t we supposed not to care what they think? We don’t care about them, so why do we care what their opinion is of us? And yet, we dress our best, act more confident, try to be someone we’re not, just for the sake of those people that we don’t like.

I tend to do this quite a lot, and in my case I think it’s about the fact that the people I don’t like make me feel uncomfortable, maybe even inadequate, and so I try to make myself better. The thing is, it doesn’t really work. You’re still not going to like them, so why even bother? Most probably they don’t even notice how you’re acting, or dressing, so I’m going to try to be myself, even around the people I dislike.

Blogging...

So, this blog has been without posts for almost...I don't know...a year?

But, lately I've had this urge to write...and so I thought, why not just continue with the blog I already have? If nobody reads it, then thats no more or less than the number of people currently reading what I'm writing, so I've got nothing to lose.

I'm just going to blog random stuff, maybe some poems, my thoughts, what I do...whatever...when I feel like it. I'm not going to be pressuring myself into writing. It doesn't work.

So this is me...being a blogger...sort of...

Thinking about thinking...

I know it's been way too long. So here it is:

Yesterday I was thinking, wondering actually if some people think more than others. I mean conscious thinking, not subconsciously. I sometimes feel like I'm permanently thinking, too much. So I was thinking about this and I wondered whether normal people ever think about what they think? I do that sometimes. I think 'Why did I think this?' Or I argue with myself in a way. So I was wondering if that was normal and then I wondered if it was normal to wonder if it was normal...or to even be thinking about it...is that normal?

I'm so weird...
Haha ttyl peoples!

Different

Being....different....

Being different is probably one of the hardest things to be, sometimes bordering on impossible, but if you do it once you will never be normal again. I'm still struggling to do it daily, because being different means being myself...and being myself is scary. I've always wanted people to like me, ever since I've been little. I never could understand why they didn't. I wanted to fit in so badly, but the harder I tried the less I did. I guess I still try, but now I try not to try which is even harder than trying...if that makes any sense....I will however, never be normal again, and I will always be proud of that!

Be different!

Ps. if you don't understand...that's fine...it just means you think differently that me ;)

Spiders....

Being...scared of spiders....isn't fun...The disgusting things are everywhere and if the sight of them terrifies you as it does me...you have a problem...Especially if your little brother, who isn't afraid of them at all, thinks it's hilarious to put a dead one on your bed. A VERY BIG HAIRY ONE at that....

When I see a spider it freaks me out for a whole day. I will look everywhere, on the ceiling, on the lightswitch (where I accidentally touched one once), even in the shower to make sure there aren't any nearby. It's completely ridiculous of course, why would there suddenly be a whole lot of them if there were one...but I can't help it.

I promise I won't post too many blogs as useless as this one. Ttyl (gotta go hit my brother over the head with something heavy...and preferably made of metal...)

Why the blog?

I started this blog today, after I saw my friend's (which is awesome by the way). The name was the first thing that popped into my head, but it got me thinking. Who am I, what could I be? Anything? What do I want to be? Many things. Well, I've never been good at talking a lot, but writing is another story altogether, so hopefully I'm going to keep this blog up to date and not forget about it. If it bores you...don't read it....

This is being me....today...